To
analyze usage of the Official Style, I chose a scholarly article about issues
concerning correctional rehabilitation, authored by the distinguished drug
court researcher, Douglas Marlowe. Although I am a Communication major, I’ve
always been interested in the life of a convicted felon, and the process of
rejoining society once on parole.
Because I do not study this topic in the academic setting, I am a
perfect example of how the Official style can be used in certain documents and
articles to prevent readers from becoming educated about the topic. It was
frustrating to read my article because Marlowe uses highly bureaucratic and jargonistic language. Not being a part of
this particular academic community, I find myself reading passages over and
over again, just to make some sense of it.
Below is a passage reflecting Marlowe’s usage of bureaucratic language in
the Official Style.
“Reenacting
this process simply demonstrates that their jaded expectations are justified and
may make them less likely to trust future overtures of assistance, which could
explain why a history of previous treatment episodes has been paradoxically
associated in some studies with negative outcomes in correctional
rehabilitation programs”
This
one complex sentence should be reconstructed into more organized and coherent
ideas. Even reading this now, after a
good twenty attempts, I still struggle with what he is trying to communicate.
What does “jaded” mean in this context? What does it mean to be “paradoxically
associated” with something? The chosen terminology is unique to Marlowe’s
field. Conscious
of it or not, Marlowe has prevented an entire group of readers who are equally
interested, from learning about correctional rehabilitation. The Official style
in this case acts as a wall, blocking readers from understanding the content of
the message. The most disappointing part about this is the inability to
learn about how our criminal justice system may be flawed and ineffective.
Without getting into the politics of it all, it is important to understand how
difficult it is for ordinary citizens to educate themselves about important
issues with most articles on the topic (like the one I chose) being written in
the Official Style.
Another
symptom of the Official Style is when the author sounds passive and
impersonal. Throughout his article,
Marlowe lacks voice. I am turned off by his dry prose style and his impersonal
tone. The passage below is an example of his inability to connect with the
reader through is usage of the Official Style.
“Kitchen
sink” interventions are usually bad practice and ill-advised policy because
they place unwarranted demands on participants and on system resources. Most
offenders are characteristically irresponsible and have considerable difficulty
satisfying basic obligations. It defies logic to expect that increasing the
dosage of ineffective treatments would improve their outcomes. This course of
action would be most likely to overburden participants, interfere with their
engagement in productive activities, and drain precious resources from
effective programs.”
This
was the part of his article when I caught myself thinking about what I was
going to eat for dinner instead of focusing on what was being said. The above passage lacks any action. It would
be more effective if Marlowe used his expertise to flat out say what a better
program would look like. Instead he drones on about the ineffective treatments
of the program, and I start to become detached from his words. It’s not because I lack interest in the
topic. It’s because Marlowe did not write this for the general population, but
rather his specific discourse community. This passage alone is written at the
Average Grade Level of 17.6, and has a reading ease score of 13. Although this
is not extreme Official Style, it is too complex to be understood for the
average reader. As we discussed in
class, most adults read at a 7th grade level. It’s difficult to want to learn about things
when you recognize it as above your level of understanding. Does the Official
Style then discourage people from wanting to learn?
It is also
important to understand how this text functions in our culture and
society. There
is currently a nationwide debate on rehabilitation and correctional programs.
The perceived failure of most prisons to discourage criminal behavior—(shown
through high recidivism rates) has renewed an interest in brainstorming new
programs to help convicted felons reintegrate back into society once released. Project Greenlight was a short-term,
prison-based reentry demonstration program, trying to do just that. It was operated by the New York State
Department of Correctional Services. The developers
of the Project Greenlight program drew extensively from research and the model
seemed very good in theory. However, Project Greenlight was a failed attempt.
Recidivism rates did not improve. Marlowe saw this as an opportunity to make his
own research heard within this community by comparing it to the failed attempts
of Project Greenlight. As an
activity system process, Marlowe is trying to persuade professionals in the
field of correctional services (his targeted audience) to prevent correctional
intuitions from developing programs similar to Project Green Light (the
motive), resulting in what he believes to be more effective rehabilitative
approaches for institutions to adapt
(the outcome). He uses the projects failure to establish his
own credibility and expertise. He was already
an established name within the criminal justice community. However, he now has
the stage to put his ideas forward on why the program failed, and offer his own
plan on what needs to be done to improve recidivism rates throughout our
country.
Marlowe uses the
Official Style to impress his target audience of professionals in the field of correctional
services. He uses bureaucratic and jargonistic
language to portray his professionalism and knowledge on the topic. Although his
ideas are important in reshaping correctional rehabilitative programs, they are
difficult to understand if you are outside of this academic and professional community. It is hard to feel like our country is
progressing in anything, if we are simply not invited to participate in the
process. The Official Style often alienates us from understanding something
that could be easily understood if written plainer.
-Emily
Stacken
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